The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Footnotes are Fun

You’d think, based on crap like this, that I was on drugs. Really it’s just ricola, a head-cold, and stress. That’s all I need to get me going!

Footnotes are Fun

It was a cool night in Northern California. Before I knew it I had my old running shoes on, and I was out the door for a walk. I needed some time to take a mental doze, and there’s no better way to do that, for me, than a little walk*.

*Unless I step on a bug**.

**I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’ve stepped on bugs before, and I will again … it’s just I usually only like stepping on bugs if I mean to step on bugs***.

***Unless I accidentally stepped on some super-insane-crazy poisonous bug. You know. One that’s all like, “rahhhh! I’m poisonous and I hate happiness!” You know the type. Killing people and such****.

****Ok, well, this would be rare – but what if that insanely poisonous (and misunderstood?) bug killed a human killer. I would think a human killer would be much less missed***** than a killer bug.

*****Sure, yes, I’m being silly. But stick with me. What if that human killer killed a bunch of people, and then went to jail and repented and thought of something that would change the world******! Huh? What about that? You judgmental a-hole. Geez.

******Assuming, of course, that it was something that changed the world for the better. Not like changing the world to make it more like how a killer wants the world to be. Yikes! Wouldn’t that be scary?! Ahhh! “Killers everywhere!” That’s what I imagine myself saying in a world like that. Yes sir. In this case I would not want the bug to die*******.

*******Ok at this point we’re going to combine footnotes (5) and (6). Or, not really. But imagine this: The bug doesn’t kill the killer, but they get in cahoots with each other. And they go on some sort of “ahhh there’s a scary bug! Oh SNAP, there’s a much scarier human!” killing spree********.

********THEN! What if the bug and the killer change the world … but into the killer bug’s version of the world! I don’t know what that would be like but I imagine it would be confusing, slimy, and disheartening. At the very LEAST! I mean, come on!, SCARY!

I stepped on a bug. Squish! Sounded kind of cute. I miss California.

The End

Comments on: "Footnotes are Fun" (1)

  1. DumbFunnery said:

    Weird … the above link may or may not be bad. But I checked it out and it’s stuff about various bug killing things. Flea powder, ant traps, etc …

    Wouldn’t that be great if I got discovered by something that didn’t realize I was trying to be funny? Actually that’d be terrible.

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