The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Tomorrow Brad

Lately I have been trying to be a better friend to myself, aka Tomorrow Brad. You see, my absolute favorite person is Right Now Brad (RNB), and sometimes I have acted just for RNB.

“I feel like if I slow down for a second I will realize I’m already stuffed … Better eat faster!!”

RNB can be a real jerk to Tomorrow Brad, as you can see from the above quote. And don’t even get me started on RNB’s sleeping habits.

“Oh man it’s midnight? Well I’m already gonna be tired tomorrow so I may as well watch one more episode …”
– Classic RNB

Here’s my revolutionary idea: acting on behalf of Tomorrow Brad more and more. I feel like this is the part about being an adult that no one warned me about.

When I was younger Tomorrow Brad and Right Now Brad saw eye to eye on a lot of things. Right Now Brad might say, “I should get Taco Bell!” and so I would. Then Tomorrow Brad would say, “Later we should eat half a pumpkin pie! While you’re out for Taco Bell pick up some more whipped cream!” The two would high five and all was merry.

Now Tomorrow Brad acts almost immediately in reaction to Right Now Brad. “Oh man,” Tomorrow Brad says 10 minutes after finishing Taco Bell, “that was such a bad idea …”

Maybe getting older isn’t about maturing or becoming more intelligent, but instead feeling the repercussions of bad ideas with force and surprising speed. Running miles on end, then eating fast food for dinner and staying up late to play video games was a dream Saturday only a few years ago … Today, it is a recipe for sadness.

Let’s hear it for our future selves, the most demanding friend you have.

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