Top 10 Overheard TSA Statements
10) “Sir please take off your pants and do the macarena. It’s for the greater good.”
9) “DANG dude why are you so turned … Oh that’s actually a gun!? … What do I do now?”
8) “Do you love America? Eat the magic Jello while I stare at your package. Also, let me see your penis.”
7) “Do you mind if I take off my pants too?”
6) “Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Either way *snap of latex glove* bend over.”
5) “I guess if I was stranded on a desert island I would take my favorite movie – The Secretary – a tent, and some stranger to grope.”
4) “Sir. SIR! Please don’t discuss politics in public that’s bad form … Hey!, somebody’s not circumcised!”
3) “Welcome to the airport … Re-live your disappointing prom night sexual experience!”
2) “I didn’t go to four minutes of TSA medical school to be questioned by some commoner!”
1) “Just picture this as a Prince music video and you’ll actually enjoy it.”
I’m traveling to the San Francisco bay area this weekend to see J Minnie, Theresa and other pals. Wish me luck!
