The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

My Zombie Roomy (9/27/10)

I didn’t want to write about this because, frankly, it’s embarrassing for both the Zombie and me. If it had just been embarrassing for him you can be sure I would’ve written about it pronto.

When I moved in to my apparent I was very excited about several things, one of these was the washer and dryer INSIDE my apartment! This was a big step up from my studio apartment in California. I thought dreamer-type thoughts, ‘I’ll wash my sheets every day!’ ‘My towels will be constantly fresh out of the dryer!’ ‘Never again will I need to do the sniff-test on a t-shirt!’

I have fallen short of these ideals.

Thus, it is with great shame that I report to you that the Zombie had crawled inside the dryer and gotten himself trapped and I didn’t discover him for nine days because I am a total slob.

I don’t really have a guess as to why the Zombie decided to cram himself into the dryer. A lot of alone time, a weird sense of humor, and being undead really lead you to make some odd decisions I guess.

On the plus side I have discovered that the Zombie eats two things: humans and dryer sheets. At first I was annoyed because those things don’t grow on trees, but man his breath has vastly improved.

We’re going to watch some of The Office now – he finds Jim attractive in a humor- and zombie-way.

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Comments on: "My Zombie Roomy (9/27/10)" (3)

  1. “On the plus side I have discovered that the Zombie eats two things: humans and dryer sheets. At first I was annoyed because those things don’t grow on trees, but man his breath has vastly improved.”

    I laughed so hard at the sudden term. Your simplistic approach has had me in stitches all night so far.

  2. What a relief that you found him. I was worried there for a while. So does this mean you can curb his brain lust with the drier sheets?

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