The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Important Discovery!!

I realized today that any phrase that starts with “hey sailor” ends up sounding like a sexual innuendo.

For example if I asked you, “paper or plastic?” you might visualize yourself at a grocery store. But if I said, “hey sailor … paper or plastic?” You would assume I’m coming on to you.

Note: I should add that whenever I write ‘hey sailor’ in my head it’s my most sultry voice. And what a sultry voice.

Other fun innuendos involving hey sailor:

Hey sailor, white or wheat?

Hey sailor, your shoe’s untied.

Hey sailor, I can’t find my dress socks. Will you help me look?

Hey sailor, wakka wakka wakka …


Now. Just as important as this discovery was this secondary discovery. There is NO WAY you can say the word “socioeconomic” and not have it kill the innuendo you were so finely crafting.

“Hey sailor, want to talk about the socioeconomic condition in West Virginia?”

NOPE! Doesn’t work!


My challenge to you, dear reader(s) – come up with an innuendo phrase that involves socioeconomic. The winner of the challenge will get a very crappy poem written to/about/for them. The poem will probably not make sense, but it will rhyme.

Comments on: "Important Discovery!!" (2)

  1. Hey Sailor, is that your dissertation on socioeconomic reform in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

    I just had a socioeconomic development… In my pants!

    Your socioeconomic environment or mine?

    You want some fries to go with that socioeconomic shakedown?

    Okay… I just wrote that word so many times it doesn’t sound real anymore. I’m done.

    Oh, yeah, Fun post!

    • My sis mentioned your response to me – and then my mom chimed in too. So you’ve got 3 fans here in the fam.

      Also, I’ll start working on something weird since you took the victory (and not just because you were the only poster …).

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