The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

I’m writing this while I’m (knock on wood) nearing the end of a cold. The future is bright, my friends. It holds a cough-free me, no runny nose, and not clearing my throat ten times an hour for no good reason.

I’m on day 8 of this cold, and because it’s so fascinating for people to read about my germs, here’s the history of dear coldie and I:

  • Day 0 – No cold yet, but that hint of a sore throat feeling … It doesn’t hurt to swallow, but I notice it, and it’s not a good sign
  • Day 1 – Bit of a sore throat, not so bad, fever struck around noon like a quick punch and I felt miserable
  • Day 2 – A day of sleep (stayed home from work)
  • Day 3 – Back at work, sore throat and hint of a runny nose
  • Day 4 – Minor throat issues, full on runny nose
  • Day 5 – This nose must have Energizer batteries, because that puppy just runs, cough emerging (oh no)
  • Day 6 – Runny nose, cough, but feel decent
  • Day 7 – Less of a runny nose!, less of a cough!, feel decent! (also woke up thinking ‘all right! I slept with my mouth closed!’)
  • Day 8 – Woke up not noticing how nice it is to sleep and be able to breath through my nose (but that’s exactly what I did, I just got back to taking that for granted quickly) … nose, cough, you get the picture

Today I feel pretty decent, I even debated the idea of a jog, but I know that wouldn’t be wise. I’d cough like a maniac if I actually exerted effort.

What I am appreciative of is my nose! On Monday blowing my nose just plain hurt, the pain of rubbing tissues on that same dang spot. Ouch. Putting lotion on was a nice thought, but soon enough I’d be blowing my nose again and there goes that effort. (Which by the way is an effort, being a relatively new guy at work and rubbing lotion around my nostrils while trying to not let co-workers see and think I’m picking my nose … but the secrecy actually probably making it look more like I AM picking my nose.)

The nose, I am happy to report, is healing itself. Now when I blow my nose it’s a nuisance and an irritation, not outright pain.

For you non-cold people reading this (why in God’s name would someone have stuck with this post til the end?), appreciate your functioning body! Appreciate your deep breaths, your non-red nose, your ability to laugh at something without fear of it turning into coughing and people going, “eck” with down-turned mouths and involuntary steps back (keeping their pivot foot in place so as not to be rude).

For those of you just embarking on a cold, hold fast, friends, embrace the soup, grow to hate the soup.

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