The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

July Haiku

July 1 (Saturday)
Cabin full of fam:
Eight bigs, seven kids, two dogs
Time since last pout: 1.

July 2 (Sunday)
Baby shower day!
With baby obstacle course
…I’ve got work to do

July 3 (Monday)
Item checked off list:
Infield home run … Off a bunt!
Whiffle ball stud, here.

July 4 (Tuesday)
Annnnnnd back on the road
It’s the lady’s turn to drive
The dog and I chill

July 5 (Wednesday)
Want to prevent war?
Watch enemies eat yogurt
It’s so disarming

July 6 (Thursday)
Clicked on an email
The sales pitch excited me
…it was for children

July 7 (Friday)
Wearing purple shorts
It’s cool … Til I’m in a stall
“There’s purple shorts guy”

July 8 (Saturday)
Neighborhood party
Summary: Neighbors are nuts
I’ll keep researching

July 9 (Sunday)
The weekend zoomed by
XBOX One must be lonely
Sorry old buddy

July 10 (Monday)
Shall I compare thee …
To a Phoenix Summer’s day?
Soul crushingly hot?

July 11 (Tuesday)
Reading baby book
Apparently, breast milk is
Made out of magic?

July 12 (Wednesday)
Staying late at work
Code won’t write itself you know
… Not yet … Or I’m hosed

July 13 (Thursday)
First stop: candy town
Next stop: seeing The Big Sick
Wife and I: thumbs up

July 14 (Friday)
Long, stressful work week
But in the end, a success
Weekend brain: ENGAGE

July 15 (Saturday)
Long hike this morning
Beautiful views, and, get this …
I saw a MARMOT!

July 16 (Sunday)
The great Sunday fight
Desire to be lazy
vs. wanting doughnuts

July 17 (Monday)
Bought Stardew Valley
XBOX graphics takes naps, and
I happily play

July 18 (Tuesday)
The yard needs mowing
*A wild raindrop appears!*
Weather? You’re allllllll right.

July 19 (Wednesday)
One month of code pain
Finally done with this piece
Sigh of relief … Check.

July 20 (Thursday)
Oh, hi healthy lunch
What’s that? You want alone time?
I’ll get junk food then!

July 21 (Friday)
Phone shopping online
WHAT!? PHONE’S COST HOW MUCH MONEY?
…My iPhone 4’s cool?

July 22 (Saturday)
Hike to start the day
No one for miles around
That’s prime selfie time

July 23 (Sunday)
Sipping coffee and
Reading about breastfeeding
Typical Sunday

July 24 (Monday)
Costco shopping list:
Milk, chicken, and a cell phone
Just Costco things, right?

July 25 (Tuesday)
McCain fights cancer!
Also fights average person’s
Chance to fight cancer!

July 26 (Wednesday)
First ‘parenting’ test
Something scary, out of hands
I just sit and hope

July 27 (Thursday)
Appointment with wife
All the concern was for naught
Heart, unclench now, please

July 28 (Friday)
Fun pregnancy game:
She feels: ALL FEELINGS. I feel:
Confusion and fear

July 29 (Saturday)
Our little friends prepped
Next phase of baby room is:
Hot air balloon pals!

July 30 (Sunday)
Sleep in? Well, ok.
Accomplish practically zilch?
Sure, I can do that.

July 31 (Monday)
Oh, just freaking great
Time to toss my home-made tee
‘Mooch made in Heaven’

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