Recently the Philadelphia Eagles won the super bowl. I was, and am, happy for them (but honestly, more happy the Pats lost). But, Eagles fans … I apologize. I should’ve provided you with this before the big day … but I had no confidence in your ability to win. (New Englanders would’ve taken a victory in stride as it is par for the course for them.)
Next time, <unexpected victorious city>, check this out first!
DumbFunnery 
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