The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘sales call’

“So … That’s a No?”

“Corruption and envy and lust for power. Cruelty and coldness. A vicious, probing curiosity. Pure, poisonous, toxic malice. You have never from your earliest years shown a shred of compassion or sympathy or kindness without calculating how it would return to your advantage. You have tortured and killed without regret or hesitation; you have betrayed and intrigued and gloried in your treachery. You are a cesspit of moral filth.”

The Amber Spyglass, by Philip Pullman

When I read this I thought, woah, that’s some insult. Then I imagined myself memorizing this phrase, or having it handy for when I get a call from a salesperson.

“We noticed you’re not currently getting … Would you like to embrace this opportunity to make yourself a better person by paying us money?”
I respond with that crazy thing. Maybe leaving out the part about murder and torture, maybe not.
“So … That’s a no?”

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