The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

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Working Harder, Not Smarter

DumbFunnery fans, rejoice! We have some exciting news for you! That’s right, we are finally getting a book published.

The book, The Idiot’s Guide to Working Harder, Not Smarter will be hitting the shelves this year sometime in mid January. The book is following its own advice, publishing at a time that is considered awful for sales and publicity.

This will be the first in a new approach taken by ‘The Idiots Guide’ book series. Embracing the culture of the United States, which is seeking out the dumbest possible answer to all questions (for examples see: the news) the Idiots Guide series has decided to explain how to be a better idiot, rather than explaining complex topics in simpler terms.

Will this backfire? I don’t know. ZERO, I repeat ZERO market research was done in preparation for this new book. Experts were interviewed, but only so that we could question their stupid degrees and mock them for their ‘years of dedication and hard work’ (losers).

What can you expect if you buy this book? Expect a lot, or a little, I don’t care.

Some of the chapters in the book include, but are not limited to:

  • Mowing Your Lawn Naked and Removing Chopped Up Pine Cones from your Bits and Pieces
  • Literary References and THE DEVIL – What Your ‘Smart’ Coworkers Are Doing While Chanting in the Woods (and How to Stop Them!)
  • How Long Should I Laugh When Someone Says ‘Fart’?
  • Checking Out a Book From the Library, Then Losing It, Then Suing the Library for Some Asinine Reason
  • How to Look Up the Word ‘Asinine’ and Then Justifying Your Anger Over Someone Knowing a Word You Don’t Know

I’m going to stop there because ‘Working Harder, Not Smarter’ isn’t for free, you free-loading slop monkey.

Please, buy the book!

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Music Monday

 

 

 

 

This Playlist

All Songs in One Playlist

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Christmas Gift Ideas

With Christmas right around the corner (what?), it’s time for DumbFunnery’s annual Christmas List!

‘OH, YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE!’

Your family has grown to be quite large. And with all those people you are related to running around holiday shopping has gone from joy to absolute dreaded chore.

To help curtail this growing exchanging gift receipts attached to stuff problem, DumbFunnery is here to help. These gift ideas will help spark a casual conversation that will start with, ‘so … do you guys just wanna … not do gifts this year?’

1 – A bag of mayonnaise with a note that says, ‘you break it, you buy it!’

2 – An IOU for a special lesson on how to give the BEST hugs, lessons provided by Uncle Jean

man in santa claus costume

Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

3 – Find someone’s spoken word poetry online, replace any references you or the gift recipient wouldn’t get with references to Clifford the Big Red Dog and get that printed on a tote bag

4 – Make a feedbag out of duct tape with a sign on the front in a different-colored duct tape that says ‘FEED ME.’ Then maybe in the card that goes with the gift a not-so-veiled comment about working out.

5 – A collection of proud mom of stickers from different elementary schools, colleges, and sports teams if they make such things. And then, to go the extra mile, go ahead and pop those on their car, too.

There you have it, a Christmas free of stress is in your future.

Of course, you could always just buy people stuff you’d think they’d like and not worry so much … but there’s always Uncle Jean and what on earth do you get Uncle Jean?

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