The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Bad Jokes Quick Hits

First of all I’d like for you to apologize to those pants for subjecting them to looking that bad. That’s what that ass said to me.
Get it?

I decided to watch the next Westminster Dog Show while listening to Jay-Z’s “99 Problems.”
Because the song has a b-word … and that’s why it’s funny.

She and I wanted to start using more words. I liked her so I took this as an opportunity. I told her if she was an angle she’d be “acute.” She told me I could’ve made a move long ago but I’m so “obtuse.” I told her I’m not fat and I ran away. Greater than 90 degrees? What a jerk.

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