DumbFunnery

– Honey … Do you hear that?
– Woah! Who is that coming to our house in the middle of the night?
– I don’t know, but I’m afraid.
– Don’t be, darling, I’m sure he won’t –
– He just walked in.
– Well, so he did.
– …
– …
– He just walked right by us!
– Is he … Is he going for our cabinets?
– What kind of person is this!? He’s just – wait he just took some of our food!
– Do something, dear!
– Do what!? Do you see that sword he has clipped to his side?
– Yes but … You could say something!
– He’s not coming for us, I say we just ignore it.
– Oh … He’s left.
– See, that wasn’t so bad. We’re just short some food, but we still have our lives.

(Some time later)

– He’s back!
– Ah! Maybe this time he’ll …
– Nope. He’s just gone and taken our food again.
– Sure enough.
– Why did you restock the pantry already!?

(Some time later)

– Swordy is back.
– Uh oh.
– You restocked the pantry again?
– The house feels incomplete if I haven’t!
– Ugh.
– You know I get the sneaking suspicion that he’s actually spoken to us before, but for some reason we can never remember and we end up saying the same things over and over to him so he just ignores us now.
– Right, like we don’t have any memory whatsoev … Are you restocking the pantry?
– Yes, of course, why wouldn’t I?