The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Tough Mudder Tweets

I am no stranger to bad ideas. Last year I did the MS150 (a 2 day, 150 mile bike ride from Houston to Austin). I made predictions before the bike ride for what I would be thinking on day 1, and day 2. This year I have been training for the Tough Mudder.

If I could tweet during the Tough Mudder, here’s how I’d expect it to go.

Mile 0: Huh, some of these guys don’t look so buff. If they can do it I can do it! Or maybe they’re secretly buff? I’m scared.

Mile 1: #WhatWasIThinking #ShootMe #hashTag

Mile 2: Two miles down! Why did I buy such garishly bright colors? I’m just covered in mud.

Mile 3: I now officially hate monkey bars. With a passion.

Mile 4: Oh man I just helped a dude up a wall thing. I feel like such a tough guy! But also nice. A tough nice guy! Like a villain in a musical?

Mile 5: I regret comparing myself to a villain in a musical.

Mile 6: If I was to do a word association game with either of the words ‘tough’ or ‘mudder’ my association would be a shrieking noise ending in a hiss.

Mile 7: Wait, did they say this was 10 to 12 miles? What is that? How much further is this!?

Mile 8: So that’s what an ice bath feels like.

Mile 9: #Crying #TellingPeopleItsSweat

Mile 10: So that’s what being shocked feels like.

Mile 11: Am I angry at myself? Is that what this is? Is is that I have self-hate?

Mile 12: Holy crap monkeys. I did it!!!! Now to shave this incredibly stupid looking beard.

 

You know I actually do have a Twitter account. You should follow me!

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