The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Attn: Ellen (10/19/16)

Front

ellen282a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

ellen282b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

With baseball postseason here, or as I call it, ‘even more baseball,’ I’ve got a proposal to improve attendance for MLB’s 726 game season.

Have someone come out with a 9-sided die, roll it, and that’s how many innings the game will be.

Now:

“Hey honey, want to watch a bunch of guys stand around for 2 hours, 45 minutes, and sprint randomly for 15 minutes?”
“No.”

With my improvement:

“Hey honey, want to watch a few innings of baseball, AND get hot dogs!?!”
“Yes!”

I’m available for consulting, MLB.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR @DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

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