The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘advice’

Tips for Planning a Surprise Party

Acknowledge to the person the surprise is for that you are doing something for them … So that they don’t go off and plan their own thing in a fit of, “but what about meeee?!”

Don’t tell your friend who can’t keep a secret til the day before. If that friend is someone who is busy, invite him or her to some fictional activity that is the same time as the actual event.

First and foremost – remember that the party is for … well, whoever it’s for. It’s not for you. Plan for their tastes, not yours!

Don’t email the spouse of the person the party is for, in case the recipient of the surprise party happens to have access to the emails of the spouse (sure, this seems specific – but it happens)

Anywho, see you in a few days for your non surprise party, Mom.

Tough Mudder Recap

Tough Mudder Electroshock Therapy

The last obstacle, Electroshock Therapy, features you getting shocked while you try not to fall while running through a muddy area. Here’s a …shock (har har): this was painful. (I’m the guy on the far right.)

On Saturday some friends and I successfully navigated the muddy waters of the Tough Mudder. It was pretty enjoyable, in that deliberately signing yourself up for a painful event sort of way.

We had signed up for a start time of 11 am, thinking that it would be nice to sleep in, eat a bit, and then get started. Ease into the day nicely. Our actual start time was 1 pm, which was definitely later than we had hoped to start. The sun was in full force.

  • Tip Number 1: Sign up for a time earlier than you want. If you end up getting that time, deal with it, the obstacles might be less muddy (therefore easier to get a grip on) and there might be less wait for some of the obstacles at the end. (For one we waited about ten minutes.)

We had decided to go for a Ninja Turtles theme. Matching green shirts, and then each of us had shorts, headband, and wristbands for our respective characters. In addition we each had on long-ish green socks and black lifting gloves (to help with monkey bars and prevent the risk of splinters). I enjoyed our costumes, but we weren’t the only Turtles out there. If you want to be truly unique, get weird.

  • Tip Number 2: Pictures … I really wanted to end up with some of the event’s photographers capturing me looking like a real tough guy as I went across the monkey bars (successfully!), or ran through the electroshock therapy, or ran up the Everest challenge. Instead there are two of my friends and I right before the race, and two of me on the obstacle known as “Twinkle Toes.”

    Tough Mudder Twinkle Toes

    Twinkle Toe-ing it up!

  • After the race the event photographers posted all of their photos which you can download for free (you just have to like a Facebook page or two). This is the only race I’ve done that has supplied free pictures so that is pretty great. A lot of the pictures end up not tagged because they can’t see your bib number under all that mud. I went through A LOT of photos to try and find a cool one of me (I am vain) and here are my conclusions …
  • What could I have done differently?
    • Make outrageously painful or elated faces at obstacles
    • Dress in garishly colored (easy to spot when looking through pictures) or very unique costumes
    • Be a girl (Honestly, I feel like the amount of pictures per girl at the run is very misleading)

As far as the run itself goes, it is very easy to walk. There will be lots of opportunities that present themselves to you as for why you should walk: right after an obstacle you are very tired and often there is so much mud that jogging will be just as fast as walking, it’s a long run, the obstacles are tiring, there is mud everywhere, so many other people will be walking, you will want to walk, your friends will want to walk …

  • Tip Number 3: Put off walking (I’m not saying I followed this tip, but in retrospect I wish I had). At any point in the race, in the next half mile there will probably be an obstacle. At that time you can walk up to the obstacle and go through it. Consider that your rest. To go into high school coach mode: the run is only as tough as you make it.
Tough Mudder Starting Gate

Starting Gate (the guy in the middle is the pep talker)

Before you begin the race you get shuffled into a little starting gate area. A very good public speaker, trained in the art of Under Armour commercial style pep talks, will tell you about the race. CAN I GET A HOO-AH! It will take TOUGHNESS. (HOO-AH!) It will take STRENGTH! (HOO-AH!)

This guy (or girl) will tell you about how this is not a race, this is not a competition, this is a challenge. As part of the challenge you will have to support your fellow Tough Mudders. Teamwork makes the dream work and all that.

  • Tip Number 4: Just Give Me a Second, Geeeeez … Inevitably (probably) you will get to an obstacle where you won’t ace it on the first maneuver. If you’re like me, you’ll probably want to try again because if-only-I’d-just-…-OK-I-got-this … It’s nice that everyone wants to help (and I was guilty of this), but sometimes things just take a few tries. So, fellow future Tough Mudders, if you see someone struggling, and there are already ten people en route to help the struggler, just move along. You don’t need to be the eleventh helper monkey.

My friends and I brought along two disposable, waterproof cameras. We have done this for other mud runs and it has worked well. For this one, it turns out, mud can really cloud some photos. Nevertheless, we got some good photos out of it (albeit some of them were a bit blurry).

  • Tip Number 5: Have fun! Bringing a camera and taking pictures of you and your friends putting yourselves through an unnecessarily difficult Saturday or Sunday morning or afternoon is a way of taking ownership of the event? Aw heck, we all know it’s for Facebook.
Tough Mudder Sasquatch

Sasquatch sighting!

 

Have You Tried This?

Sometimes I come up with an idea for a post for my blog and I think, hey, this is actually pretty good. Then, this may seem confusing, I think, this is too good for my blog …

My ultimate goal is to get published (as I’ve written about a few times … here, and here for example). With that in mind, it makes sense that I would want to do something else with my occasional gems (or at least what I consider to be gems).

One complaint I have is that I wish there were more places to submit my brand of weird. I feel like I would have better luck if I was a dramatic/full of confusing symbolism short story writer, or a sci-fi writer – it seems like there’s oodles of that stuff. And poetry? I don’t know that I’ve ever seen a goofball poem in a magazine, just the serious and artsy stuff. (The type that I read and say, “I really like the language in this poem but I have no idea what it’s saying.”) A number of magazines I have looked through to see if they would accept submissions from someone with my style have not panned out.

What’s My Point?

I do have a few places that I send things to. I figured I would write a post on this because it might force me to look up more magazines/popular online sources and then maybe I would quit being lazy and send more submissions out with fingers and toes crossed.

Bonus: I’ll be a kind internet neighbor to other quirky humor/oddball bloggers out there and share places that I think are a good fit for that particular category.

Here’s Where You Can Send Your Brilliant Quirky/Humor Story:

Shouts and Murmurs, New Yorker

McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

Mad Magazine (I have to be honest, I haven’t read one of these so I haven’t researched this … I think you need some art attached and I stink at drawing so I’ve never looked into them seriously)

Cracked.com (I’ve only read occasional things here and they haven’t been the type I write … I should look at this more though …)

McSweeney’s Quarterly (I’m reading an issue for the first time now and it seems like more literary fiction)

The Believer Magazine (I just subscribed to this so … I’ll get back to you, but I’m guessing memoir type essays)

 

If you are reading this and you know of another great source for that kind of writing, please let me know!!

If you add a good source in the comments I will be sure to link back to your blog/twitter/whatever when I add your revision to my post.