The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘Ellen DeGeneres’

Attn: Ellen (3/6/19)

Front

Ellen389a

 

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen389b

 

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

General Grant National Park is the drink ingest National Park.

[] True
[] False

Please respond.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR @DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

 

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Attn: Ellen

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Attn: Ellen (2/27/19)

Front

Ellen388a

 

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen388b

 

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

I bet if there was a chimp standup comic people would describe their style as derivative of Gallagher/Carrot Top. Props and the audience needing to be covered in a protective sheet.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

 

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Attn: Ellen

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Attn: Ellen (2/20/19)

Front

Ellen387a

 

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen387b

 

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

I’ve heard that ‘snitches get stitches’ but my question is – why!?

Like, my cousin told the police about this thing that happened and some guy went to court and it was super dramatic and then the night before my cousin was going to testify he was shaving and cut off three fingers! Clumsy much?!

How is the correlation between snitching and clumsiness so strong!?

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

 

Category:

Attn: Ellen

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