The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘fantail’

Attn: Ellen (3/11/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

We learned that monkeys can be a real nuisance. For example, a fellow tourist told us of a time when a monkey jumped onto his patio, walked into his hotel room, acknowledged him on the bed, went to his suitcase, then opened it!, and looked around for snacks! Incredible!

Because my wife and I are unintelligent animal fans, we now want to travel with an extra suitcase full of snacks.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

P.S. There are no possible downsides, right?

Why am I doing this?

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Attn: Ellen

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Attn: Ellen (3/4/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

The Taj Mahal is too impressive to describe with words so I’ll try this:

[A picture so amazing you’ll just have to scroll up and admire it! … And following that picture:]

(And to think, I want to be a professional writer.)

(Hey, we should talk about that! No, really!)

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

(that’s my email too, just add an @gmail in there)

Why am I doing this?

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Attn: Ellen

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Attn: Ellen (2/25/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

We’re back! Where were we? And what do I mean by we? Are you assuming I have gone crazy? (An assumption backed by my writing on slanted lines?) Do I now only talk in the form of questions? All these questions, and more, will be answered in the coming weeks when I share highlights of my wife and I’s (that’s the we) trip (honeymoon) to India! (That’s the where.)

So get excited, Ellen, ol’ buddy, ol’ pal!

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

Category:

Attn: Ellen

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