Joe was a practical man. When there was a potential problem he took practical steps to mitigate that problem. In 1999, when Y2K talk was rampant Joe bought a large number of foodstuffs to store away as a precautionary measure.
Now, in 2018, some of the foods were just a year away from hitting their expiration time.
Joe, practical as ever, decided to make a meal out of some of those to-be-expired foods and the meal almost made him want to commit acts of horrible unpleasantness. The food had not held up very well.
But, Joe thought, I can’t just let this food go to waste. That would be … wasteful. (Practical even in his word choices.)
Joe had been working for 32 years and approached work from a … you guessed it … practical perspective. Yes, some of his co-workers occasionally made him want to commit acts of horrible unpleasantness but you just grit your teeth and go on.
Perhaps, maybe, on occasion, Joe did little things to get back at his loathsome coworkers to level out his emotional state. Nothing extreme, just enough to balance the scorecard. For example, Joan prints every email she gets even though that’s dumb. Joe, Mr. Practical, got Joan fired by sabotaging the data she reported on to make her appear inept.
Ahhh. Wait. Joe. You did what?
Looking at this large stockpile of to-be-expired foods Joe crafted a plan.
No, seriously. You got her fired? That’s …
Joe began to make delicious looking dishes using this food and would bring them to the office on occasion. Never frequently, because people might start to leearn to avoid the snacks left out in the breakroom.
But piece by piece, can by can, Joe got rid of his Y2K supply. And oh, that sweet reward. That look of bitter betrayel as someone would bite into what appeared to be a delicious snack …
Joe, seriously. I don’t want to be your narrator anymore. You’re not right, man.
Joe, ever practical, had already set his sights on what would come next for him. He knew he needed to continue to dish up revenge for those he felt did not live by a good set of rules. He was running to be HOA president. Joe knew he could continue to get that look of betrayel, acting as a dedicated member of the HOA.
Guess who recently had a piece of very old Halloween candy when someone brought in a bag of leftovers? And guess who recently was annoyed by their HOA?
Your Friendly Neighborhood Blogger,