The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘obama’

Questions About the News From Someone Who Pays 5% Attention

So, like, Obama cares … But what does he care about? I don’t get it. And why are people angry about him caring? Does he care about stupid stuff or something? And, uh, hello news people, it’s Obama careS … not Obama care. Grammar much?

Um, ok, I’m really confused. A rod plays baseball? Do they mean the bat? Why don’t they say bat? And what does it mean to say a rod is on performance enhancing drugs? Like the bat has super powers? Is it made out of some super tough wood or something? Seriously, I don’t get it.

Ben Affleck is the new Batman? That’s cool. I’ll totally see that.

Weekly Wacko (47)

“Where Do You Stand on the Important Issues? Like My Heaving Bosoms?”*

My senior year of college I was walking around campus one day when I noticed a little poster. They had posters, or little signs up, up all the time for everything. Sports, volunteer activity, blood bank (gross), student body, whatever.

At this time there was, apparently, a student body election going on.

I’m sure those college politicians did something – I was just blissfully unaware of it.

The election posters all had the same trend: a name, maybe a little slogan, a nice photo of the candidates’ face.

One poster caught my eye.

It was, of course, an attractive girl and … she wasn’t just showing her face. She had cropped the photo so that she could also show her, just being honest, nice chest.

I thought this was hysterical, pathetic, and possibly clever.

When I was hanging out with some friends later that night I brought up. I don’t remember exactly how the conversation goes, but here’s a guess.

“Have you guys seen the poster for that one chick [described her somewhat]?”
“Probably?”
“Did you notice she’s got a little bit of chest going on?”
“What?”
“She purposefully included a little bit of her chest because … well, you know …”

That’s when someone popped up to include a fantastic joke: “You guys, this election is not about a rack.”

A rack. Iraq. Get it?

*As far as the title goes, that’s not a real quote. I’d like to think, though, that had there been a debate at school – that she would’ve said that. Ooh, and it’d be neat if Fabbio was her campaign manager.

Yesterday Obama ended “officially”* the war in Iraq. Here’s hoping things work out well for the soldiers, their families, and that in the case of the good intentions in Iraq that the intent does equal the impact.

*I’ll offer this definition of when a war is over. If I found out a friend or family member was going to be stationed in Germany or Korea I’d say, “oh awesome! Buy an awesome couch for me!” If the same friend or family member was going to be stationed in Iraq I’d say, “I’ll pray for you and your family.” Again – let’s hope for worldwide utopia, eh folks?

To end on a lighter note,  as an Army Brat son of a West Point grad let me say –

Eat, drink, and beat Navy.