My boss: “Hey!, good job at the demo!”
Me: “Thanks! … Yeah, I think it went well.”
My boss: “I’d say! You got a high-five!”
Whoo! Sorry for the bragging post, but I found that very funny. Every work has their concept of good and bad, and ours is apparently measured in high-fives.
The same day that happened, a co-worker used the phrase “making kittens” as a synonym for “causing trouble.”
It was a very good day of work.
Recently I bought a loofah, and it has changed a lot of things for me. “A loofah?,” you might be saying, “you never seemed distant to me!”
After a while I would finally get your joke. A play on the word “aloof,” and I would respect you less.
Moving on.
The loofah has changed a lot of things in my life. My finances have improved, I’m eating healthier, I think I look great, and most importantly, my personal relationships have developed more as a result. I find that after using the loofah while I shower that I can relate to people much better!
I’m almost ashamed to admit the conversation I had with a friend of mine just a few weeks ago. We’ll call my friend Jerry. Not for no reason, too, it’s because his name is Jerry.
Jerry: “Brad, they’re going to foreclose on my house.”
Me: “Jerry. That is news. This is an update to me.”
See what I did there? I wasn’t sure what he was feeling so I couldn’t guess what emotion I should have. I just limited myself to statements! With my loofah’d hindsight, I can see that he was probably SAD, or HUNGRY. Two key emotions for any human.
Jerry: “I’m so depressed.”
Me: “Well, let’s inflate you! With french fries!”
Jerry: “….Um. I guess I could go for a shake?”
Thankfully I stumbled into just the right thing to say. Phew!
I won’t have to just stumble my way into relating to people now! No, sir! Not with the loofah in my life!
Oh yeah. I tried some Bobby Brown on the Zombie and it had no effect.
I was hoping maybe it’d make him really happy, or equally scared, or something. It just would’ve been so funny to me.
DumbFunnery 