The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Archive for January, 2010

De Jour of the Week (12/27/09)

12/27/09

I read this to my mom and she said “that’s scary.” And I said, “why’s that scary?” (I was going for funny, not fear.) Her response ended up making her “that’s scary” statement make SOME sense – but I honestly can’t remember it. Besides, who doesn’t love a good mystery?

Please Don’t Contradict Me When I’m so Clearly Wrong

Please don’t contradict me when I’m so clearly wrong
Just nod your head, say ‘mmhmm’, and play along

I’ve had a long day and I’ve thrown logic out the window
And if I say I want ice cream for dinner you say ‘let’s go’

I’ve mixed this up with that other thing
Don’t point out my error while smiling, grinning, smirking

You know darn well what I meant
Don’t point out the facts, your time could be much better spent

But don’t make the mistake of thinking I’m wrong often
I’m not, this is a hypothetical poem for that situation that’s if/when

In fact, now that I start to think about it – you’re wrong!
Who is so dumb as to not know by now to play along?
Sure, yes, I’m so clearly wrong
But you could’ve, should’ve, WILL HAVE TO learn to play along

Why aren’t you nodding your head and playing along?
CLEARLY I am once again spewing out falsehoods, fuzzy logic and all other things wrong

You’re smart at work, you’re smart at home – but maybe a little too smart
One plus one can equal three if I want it to, I know it in my heart

You remember that time I came home fuming and said ‘my boss is a jerk’?
And you said ‘well dear, last week you said your boss is the best part of your work?’
I mean really, honestly, your obliviousness was cute when it was a quirk
But if you don’t get with the program I’ll drop the q-u and it’ll just be an irk

Ok fine … I admit it … I’m sommmmmmmetimes wrong
And … I’d appreciate it if you could play along

I know your knowledge and corrections I should probably embrace
But honestly, I’d rather punch you in the face

Weekly Wacko (10)

I wrote this maybe 2 weeks ago because I wanted to voice my frustration over unknown work stuff. So this post is more like a diary-entry than my usual thing. Anyhow, it’s a big news thing for me so I wanted it to be able to go back and read it x years from now and be able to say, “ohhh, I remember young Brad, he was dumb, and he smelled funny. I’m glad I’m not him.”

Goodbye Silicon Valley, Hello Houston

At work on December 9 (2009) I got an email from a guy in Houston. I had applied for a job down there a while back.

A little background – the economy has affected my company as it has so many, and the original assignment I’d been doing since being hired was cut. My last day doing that was September 30th. Since then I’ve been bouncing around to short-term assignments and looking for a long-term one. It has been incredibly frustrating because I have not known when/if I’ll be moving, and I figured if I ended up on company overhead for a while then I would be out of a job.

I had received some word from Houston before which led me to believe they were interested in me. And the job description matched pretty well with work I had been doing before so I felt pretty strong about my chances.

On December 9th I talked with my potential future-manager and I asked a few questions about the work. He didn’t know much about what I would be doing exactly (programming stuff). This worried me because how does he know I’m a good fit if he doesn’t know better about what I’ll be doing … But, one bright spot from the conversation was that he said he’d decided to hire me and then realized he’d never once spoken to me. This either means he’s a really bad manager, or my recommendations from the other folks I’ve worked with were good. Actually now I’m worried about that, too.

I’m not sure how evident this is in other things I’ve posted – but for random people reading this I’m a glass half-empty kind of guy.

Anyway. I am still unsure if I’ll get the job – paperwork stuff has to be sorted out. My potential start-date as of right now would be January 11th which doesn’t give me much time left in California.

When I move to Houston I want to move to a place where I’ll have roommates. I really like having my own space and apartment, but I took a long time before I made any friends and I don’t want to repeat that.

I got in bed last night and pictured myself in bed the night before my first day of (potential) work in Houston. That’s a very depressing thought.

New work. New home. Don’t know anybody. Have to prove myself. Not sure if I can do my work well. Won’t know the co-workers quirks or what they’ll be like. An outside of work-project I’ll be doing – it’s part of work but it’s during my free time (read: lots of unpaid overtime). I’m worried about how I’ll perform with that as well. To sum it up: oy.

Also, I’ve liked the Silicon Valley way more than I thought I would. This is the 10th different place I’ve lived and usually I don’t miss or really appreciate a place until I’ve moved. I think being unsure if/when I’ll move for the past three months has had the silver lining of helping me to appreciate California sooner. Also, I figured from the start I wouldn’t be here for too long so I’ve tried to get out and do a fair amount.

Anyway – I’m just venting and expressing my frustrations. If the job works out it will be really nice to know where I’ll be living for at least a year (the assignment length). Also I went to college in Dallas so I could drive up there to visit some friends. And my sister really wants to go to South by Southwest (SxSW) in Austin, so we can meet there for that. AND, Houston’s not too far from New Orleans and I’ve never been there. I call this paragraph: glass half full ish (ish being the radio version of a certain s word).

I’ll say this in person as well – but I want to thank JMinnie and Theresa (who you may have seen write comments on the blog) for putting up with me and helping to make California as fun as it was. And all of the folks I met through them as well.

Enough sissy stuff. I’m going to watch porn and “Die Hard” and play “Grand Theft Auto” right now. All at the same time. And shotgun a beer. Boo yah.

***
This is an update – on Friday December 18th I found out some good news. I am going to start in Houston on January 25th rather than the 11th, and my work is going to pay for some of my relocation costs. Sweet!

Wish me luck random strangers, and people who know me who read this.

Good-bye Silicon Valley, hello Houston!