I saw the headline to get you to click on this CNN video, and the headline was “If a shark Attacks, hit it here.” And yes, I’m pretty sure they had the A capitalized on attacks. No idea why. Anyhow – it inspired this poem.
If a Shark Attacks, Hit it Here
(by Jaws’ cousin, Todd)
The news comes on every day
With the same basic message said in a different way:
Death, struggle, triumphs and tribulations
Caused by taxes, toil, emotional and physical ammunitions.
For the short summertime we sharks are in a rut
It’s “shark attack” this and “beach advisory” that
You’ve got this blame-game down pat!
The world continues with its usual woes and wails
But the ‘exclusive-interview-with-the-survivor’ ship sets its sails
A story called ‘In case of shark attack, hit it here’?!?!
But the hit has already been delivered, my dear.
You think I’m all instincts, not intellectually smart –
But I’ve also got a tender, feeling heart –
So the next time you hear, “man fends of shark!”
Please don’t insult me by taking a gander.
Now if you’ll excuse me,
Above me I see
A very slow, long-limbed seal
And he’ll make a delicious meal
(But wait – do seals have long limbs?
Ah well!, like cousin J said, “it’s bound to be delicious if it swims!”)
Oh yeah and I’ve got a Facebook page now called … ready for it?! … “Get Brad Stanley Published.” Join up!!
Comments on: "De Jour of the Week (8/4/10)" (2)
Todd!? Jaws cousin is named Todd? Todd the shark…
Good poem but that had me cracking up before I started reading it.
Thank you sir! Todd seems a good New England name to me, so why not?