The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Archive for the ‘Attn: Ellen’ Category

Attn: Ellen (3/18/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

This is a big, beautiful wall of windows. That day we had a guide who explained the wall (ladies stand behind windows and watch people marching into town), and then the guide took a cool photo of Lauren (the Mrs.) with the wall reflected in her shades.

Later I tried to duplicate this but instead had a very close up picture of my wife giving me a look that says ‘why are you so close to my face?’

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

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Attn: Ellen

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Attn: Ellen (3/11/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

We learned that monkeys can be a real nuisance. For example, a fellow tourist told us of a time when a monkey jumped onto his patio, walked into his hotel room, acknowledged him on the bed, went to his suitcase, then opened it!, and looked around for snacks! Incredible!

Because my wife and I are unintelligent animal fans, we now want to travel with an extra suitcase full of snacks.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

P.S. There are no possible downsides, right?

Why am I doing this?

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Attn: Ellen

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Attn: Ellen (3/4/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

The Taj Mahal is too impressive to describe with words so I’ll try this:

[A picture so amazing you’ll just have to scroll up and admire it! … And following that picture:]

(And to think, I want to be a professional writer.)

(Hey, we should talk about that! No, really!)

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

(that’s my email too, just add an @gmail in there)

Why am I doing this?

Category:

Attn: Ellen

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