The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘dumb’

Attn: Ellen (10/22/14)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

When I was in the 8th grade my mom, my sister and I visited a college for my sister to see if she’d like it. A guy at the college said to my mom, “oh is your son here to see the college?” to which my mom replied, “no, my daughter.” This caused the guy to give me a long, hard look. Thankfully my sister then came out of the bathroom so the guy’s questions were answered.

This weekend is my bachelor party. My brother and sister are my co-best man. My goal for the bachelor trip is to convince as many people as possible that my sister is a guy.

Wish me luck!

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

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Attn: Ellen

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Turn Down For What?

If you haven’t heard, there’s a popular song right now by DJ Snake (yep) and Lil Jon which has the line “turn down for what” said quite frequently.

This begs the question, what are you turning down for?

Turn Down for …

5. Your friend with the relationship troubles in the backseat just got a call … Time to eavesdrop under the guise of letting her hear her conversation better.

4. Your girlfriend is asleep on the coach ten minutes into the movie she wanted to watch but that you didn’t. Volume: muted. XBOX 360? On. Destiny? You betcha.

3. What? Sorry, I had my headphones in. What?

2. Ooooh turn volume off! Turn the volume off! I think I heard my crazy old lady neighbor trying to sing rap songs!

1. You could’ve SWORN the turn was right there … Ugh! Ok, time to turn down the music because that’ll somehow make you less lost.

***

I was going to include the link for the video but then I watched it for the first time and it actually makes the lyrics for the song seem intelligent (aka the video is super dumb). So instead here’s a song I like. (The video is very odd but the song is fun.)

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Du Jour of the Week

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Attn: Ellen (10/8/14)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

I never knew it until this moment, but camels look like the creation of someone who is really bad at photoshop.

“Hey dude, do, like, a horse combined with Skeletor … Oh! And give him two giant tumors … Just cuz.”

What, evolution leading to that makes more sense?

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

Category:

Attn: Ellen

Tagged with: