The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘football’

2017 SMU Football Predictions

Hi sports fans, here we go again.

It’s been a few years since I’ve done this – let’s recap.

  • 2011 Prediction: 8-4, Reality: 7-5
  • 2012 Prediction: 8-4, Reality: 6-6
  • 2013 Prediction: 5-7, Reality: 5-7
  • 2014 Prediction: 7-5, Reality: 1-11 (the head coach resigned in September, it was an ugly year)

Since then I skipped 2015 and 2016, perhaps I was afraid that I had played some role in the 2014 debacle, or perhaps I forgot/was lazy. In 2015 SMU hired a new coach, Chad Morris, and they went 2-10. In 2016 they went 5-7.

Now we are in the coaches third season, let’s take a wild, uneducated stab at their schedule. My knowledge of SMU’s abilities and those of their opponents are based solely on … I don’t even know what. It’s like that thing when you start saying something and you hope something good will come to your mind and you just dazzle everyone. That’s where my knowledge comes from.

  • 9/2 vs SFA … Victoryfootball-helmet-01sept2015
  • 9/9 vs North Texas … Victory
  • 9/16 @ TCU … Loss
  • 9/23 vs Arkansas State … Loss
  • 9/30 vs Connecticut … Victory
  • 10/7 vs Houston … Loss
  • 10/21 @ Cincinnati … Victory
  • 10/27 vs Tulsa … Loss
  • 11/4 vs UCF … Victory
  • 11/11 @ Navy … Loss
  • 11/18 @ Memphis … Victory
  • 11/25 vs Tulane … Victory

Total record: 7-5.

SMU football, you old friend/foe, I try to set my expectations low so that I won’t be frustrated but … I know you, you’ll still find ways to hurt my heart. LET’S DO THIS! FOOTBALL!!!

Attn: Ellen (11/30/16)

Front

ellen288a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

ellen288b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

A lot of books and movies have a character with some terrible secret, and that character lives with anxiety/worry/fear/etc. and someone threatens to reveal that awful secret and the character feels relief even though they also don’t want that to happen?

That’s me every football season – except I’m living anxiously until I realize my teams I like have zero chance and then I can finally relax. Hope free beats delusional state of wishful thinking in my book.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

Attn: Ellen (10/12/16)

Front

ellen281a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

ellen281b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

My wife is on a quest to find every possible sentence in the English language to express disinterest in football.

It’s pretty cool to be part of history being made.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

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