The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘sink’

The Sink

Monday Morning

Don’t worry about it, buddy, I’m empty, you’re in a rush, just leave your cereal bowl and spoon in here.

Monday Evening

Oh man, long day huh? Back into the swing of things. Just put that pot and plate and stuff in here, we’ll take care of this tomorrow. It’ll be real quick.

Tuesday Morning

Leave for work now! QUICK! Or you’ll be stuck behind the school bus!!

Tuesday Evening

Uh … I’m pretty sure that episode of The Office you’ve seen 7 times isn’t going to get watched an 8th time by itself.

Wednesday Morning

Ok. Tonight. All right? I’m starting to get pretty full here.

Wednesday Evening

Hey rookie, you see that I have a whole second half that’s empty right? There are two of me. Come on. Step up your game.

Thursday Morning

Cereal again, huh? Cool man! See you tonight!

Thursday Evening

How was going out to happy hour? Oh soup for dinner? Cool! Don’t worry about it, cleaning a bowl is so easy it practically doesn’t even count as adding to the pile of dishes.

Friday Morning

Week-end! Week-end! Week-end! Seriously, you should clean these dishes tonight so you don’t stare at the sink all weekend thinking about how you need to get that done like it’s some big chore but in reality it takes a few minutes.

Friday Evening

DUDE! It’s Friday! You should be partying! And by partying I mean playing video games and eating pizza on your couch!

Saturday Morning

How’d your jog go? Pretty good? You look tired, you should go nap.

Somehow Skip to Sunday Evening

Ok buddy. Seriously. Let’s get this done. Put on Sunday Night Football, get these dishes knocked out.

This week. This is the week. You’ll think about how nice and clean the place looks when the sink is empty, and you’ll never once leave a dirty dish in here. Everything will be taken care of, so it’ll never seem like a chore. You got this!

Monday Morning

Don’t worry about it man, it’s just a bowl and a spoon!

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Du Jour of the Week

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Weekly Wacko (61)

Sink Technology Innovations

My dorm room my freshman year of college had a sink and mirror in it. This was nice because my roommate and I could brush our teeth and shave in the room if we wanted (any time spent not wearing shower shoes is time well spent).

One day I decided I looked scruffy enough and decided to shave.

I got out my shaving stuff, put on some shaving cream, turned on the hot water and started. After one stroke with the blade I ‘cleaned’ it. I did this again. And again.

Without realizing it, I was tapping the blade on the stopper in the sink.

I realized that soon enough when water starting filling up.

Uh oh.

I had completely closed the stopper (one of those metal ones that push up or down, simple enough).

I tried to get my fingers between the stopper and the metal around it to pry it up. No dice. I got out a penny – not thin enough. Eventually I dug out my Swiss Army knife (I really have no idea why I thought I would need this, but it turns out I did use it. Once. Definitely worth it.). I was able to get the blade in to pry open the stopper.

That’s when I noticed, between the cold and hot water taps was the metal part that you simply push or pull to open or close the stopper.

It’s not that I had never used a sink like this before, it’s just that I’m a moron.

And if you need further proof – I did the SAME EXACT THING about a month later.

(The second time I did that I told my English class about it and my professor told me that’s not the sort of thing I should tell people. I told her, in my head, ‘yeah? well you’re ugly.’)

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Weekly Wacko

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