I am getting back into running long distances as part of my training for the Tough Mudder and, I’ll tell you, it inspires weird thoughts.
I’m not alone in this, as the author of The Oatmeal also described the same thing. Although he is much more popular, runs farther than me, faster than me, and is funnier than me. Classic jerk if you ask me.
This past Sunday I ran 9 miles in Galveston. It was a nice change of scenery from my usual long runs, but there was one problem: the mosquitoes (I have since realized that even where I live the mosquitoes seem to have taken over). The abundance of mosquitoes (and the long distance) took my mind to a weird thought …
I decided that mosquitoes are the world’s most intelligent species. Many years ago they began collecting blood samples from different animals all over the world and studying them. They would bring these samples back to local labs and look to see what animals were best at surviving. A utilitarian species, the mosquitoes (who were not at the time the same mosquitoes as we know them) realized something: they were not fit for survival.
The optimally designed rat finks.
These primitive mosquitoes saw, by their extensive research and studying, that the ideal form for survival was … well, mosquitoes as we know them today. But there came to be a disagreement in the community of mosquitoes. A gathering of all the chief researchers was organized and it did not go as planned. Instead of the group coming together with one optimal design for survival, a schism hit the group.
Each group had definite characteristics that could be noticed. Group A was more outgoing, social, and adventurous. They looked at the design idea for the mosquito and saw perfection.
Group B was more withdrawn. They often preferred to look at their conclusions on their own, in the dark, away from others. This group saw the idea of flying as needlessly dangerous. They presented a second idea. They claimed this would be just as hearty and could withstand anything the first design could withstand, and then some. Group B became … cockroaches.
So there you have it. That’s what I was thinking about while dog tired and staring at this beautiful scenery.
Galveston, TX
DumbFunnery 