The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘dumb’

Call Signs that Mean Something is About to Go Down

Let’s say you’re out and about, and it’s near a holiday, and you overhear someone say something on a phone, or radio, or … any other device that I can’t think of. Something about it doesn’t seem right – the tone of voice, something in the air isn’t right, or maybe … maybe it’s a really dorky phrase.

Here are just five of the many possible bad joke call signs/code phrases that let you know something is about to go down.

“This is Roundhouse … Things are kicking off.”

“This is bull, I’m at the China shop.”

“Papa Smurf, this is Azrael, I’m on the prowl.”

“One checking in …”
“Two checking in …”
“Three checking in …”
“Four checking in …”
“Sounds like we’re ready to rock.”

“This is sugar, I’m at the spice factory, commencing operation ‘make nice.'”

All’s Whale That Ends Whale

Coming this fall prepare yourself for the latest cheap capitalization on a family name with Captain Ahab, Ishmael and the gang. Joseph H. Melville, great great grandson of Herman Melville, will take you on a brand new adventure with some familiar faces in All’s Whale That Ends Whale.

Was the white whale that Captain Ahab saw actually just a large human body floating in the ocean a ways away? And was that human body murdered? And say, didn’t that one shipmate say he used to work as a detective?

Who’s this lovely lady who is a ship inspector? Can Ahab charm her away from the unsafe practices on his ship … and into his arms?

Is the crew extra mutinous today, or is that a case of the fabled vampire scurvy, scurvy that causes vampire-like tendencies to develop?

And what’s that over the ocean, a space ship! … from OUTER SPACE?

Find out all of this, AND MORE, in All’s Whale That Ends Whale!

Attn: Ellen (7/8/15)

Front

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen DeGeneres postcard

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

Recently I went to Minnesota for the first time and I found it to be pretty, full of friendly people, and lots of in-laws.

This may not hold for all.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?