The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘dumbfunnery’

If I Started a Think Tank, Part 2

If you recall (if not here it is), I posted a poll before to come up with the name of the imaginary think tank I would start. The masses responded in force (total votes: 9) and there was a tie between:

  • *Beep, Beep, Beep* – Hey, what’s that sound? Oh, nothing, just that THINK TANK backing up its ideas with SCIENCE and FACTS and such
  • Brain Shells (you know, the weapon of choice of a think tank)

Feel free to comment and force the tie one way or another … or I’ll be forced to use independent thought which is just rude of you, dear reader.

Moving on to today’s topic of interest …

Who will be a part of this Think Tank?

I haven’t extended the invitations just yet, but here is my first cut at the team.

  • The ghost of Albert Einstein, via Mellena Sellena, “Your Guide to the Stars and Life Hereafter”
    (I haven’t met this lady, but I’ve driven by her shop/home a few times and it’s thirty dollars to talk to one dead person, forty-five for two. Soooo …)
  • The ghost of Christmas Future, via Mellena Sellena, “Your Guide to the Stars and Life Hereafter”
    (This one could be a challenge for Mel Sel, I’m assuming she’ll be cool with me calling her that … if not it may not work out. I don’t know if she can contact fictional ghosts, but since I don’t really think people can contact ghosts anyway I figure why not get my money’s worth and make her really use her imagination and creativity.)
  • Lindsay Lohan
    (She will be working the ‘what not to do’ department.)
  • This guy Ed I used to work with, he’s super smart
    (Not only is he super smart but he has an awesome beard.)
  • Yours truly, DumbFunnery!
    (Can you imagine how many hipster chicas I can talk to when I say I’m on a Think Tank?! Why, hello, slightly less empty social calendar!)

What do you think of the team so far? Any suggestions? Would you like to be a part of the team?

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Du Jour of the Week

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Don’t Eat the Green Trees

When I lived in Alaska (kindergarten through 2nd grade) my best friend Chris and I hung out all the time. Little kid friendships are the best because it’s so easy to satisfy all your needs.

Chris liked toys. I liked toys. Chris liked video games. I liked video games! And, oh my GOD!!, Chris liked playing outside … you’ll never guess who else liked playing outside.

One day I was over at Chris’s when dinner time hit. His mom asked if I’d like to stay over. I’m sure I called my mom, and we had the brilliant/obvious/manipulative little kid talk – ‘which dinner is better.’

(My mom answers)
“Hey mom.”
“Hey! How’s it going!?”
“Good … what’s for dinner?”
“Oh we’re going to have a casserole.”
“Oh … Is it all right if I stay over at Chris’s for dinner? His mom invited me.”
“Sure that’s fine. Come home after dinner. Be sure to say please and thank you.”
“Ok. Bye mom.”

Yes, my mom probably would’ve reminded me of the manners.

Finally, it was dinner time. The food was laid out on the table and we began to dish up. I’ll take a little of this, thank you, could you please pass that, thank you, what’s that in the middle? Don’t know. Don’t want it.

“Brad, do you want a green tree?”
A green tree? The dish in the middle contained the ‘green trees.’
“Um, sure.”
I’d never had a green tree before.
I grab one, pop it in my mouth, and I try to pull on my best poker face as I go from excited anticipation about a new food to disgust.

Green tree! GREEN TREE! Those fiends fed me broccoli!

Which just goes to show that broccoli, by any other name, is still gross.

(Unlike another food which my mom called something else, had me try, found out I liked it, and then laughed as she told me it was something I hitherto ‘hated.’ Everyone’s a trickster.)

(Update: I’ve since come around some on broccoli … but I still favor doughnuts over broccoli any day of the week.)

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Weekly Wacko

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DumbFunnery Holiday Card

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Pictures

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