The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘Ellen DeGeneres’

Attn: Ellen (4/19/17)

Front

Ellen305a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen305b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

This issue of Vogue featured the famous article about the woman who had her head sewn onto the body of a bird.

I guess you could say she was a little cuckoo.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

Attn: Ellen (4/12/17)

Front

Ellen304a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen304b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

I wonder how many photographers have taken a magical picture like this only to get home, look at the picture, notice a giant horse penis.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

Attn: Ellen (4/5/17)

Front

Ellen303a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen303b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

I’m debating writing a book where the narrator is ornery and impatient, perhaps even a trifle racist. Here’s a taste:

“Gene! Quit acting like such a basket case!!,” she said this, crossing the room, arms gesticulating wildly.

Gene, unmoved, replied with silence.

He failed to reply because Gene is literally a cage for baskets. Seems obvious to me, you twit.

<And Scene.>

What do you think??

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery

Why am I doing this?

P.S. Like the drawing on the postcard? Pass on your compliments to @NotNotTSHendrik.