The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Archive for the ‘Du Jour of the Week’ Category

Half Price Book Store Gems

I’ve got a break between classes (although during this time I really should go ahead and brush up on a class I’m going to be taking … but that’s just no fun). What will I do with my extra free time? Half Price Books has me covered!

I just bought Assignment – Black Viking. Why, you ask? Well, how’s THIS for a reason!

Edward S. Aarons

The back of the book starts with this, “Something damned strange was happening to the weather.” I was really hoping it would have a decent amount of noir style but instead it’s more of a James Bond kind of thing going on. You know, total hot shot stud with a leggy dame who either is working with him or wants to kill him (I’ll find out eventually).

What’s next on the reading list? Oh, I don’t know, maybe Epidemic Detectives!

Fred Warshofsky

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If I Owned a Christmas Tree Store

What’s the most important step in owning any store? (And by most important I mean most fun.) Naming the store!

If I happened to sell Christmas trees, here are some potential names:

  • Tree-diculous
  • If You Don’t Shop Here That’s Tree-Son
  • Tree-t Yo Self
  • The doctor Called, You’re Going Into Tree-Mission!
  • Don’t Just Pine About It
  • Step Aside Vegetarians and Omnivores! – I’m Coniferous
  • Your Windows Pine to be Noticed

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A Plea to My Friends

You know what is really unlikely? Super heroes. I just can’t imagine that there are people out there who can fly, or who have super strength, or can make stuff explosive just by having a Cajun accent.

But as unlikely as it is that there are super heroes, it’s even MORE unlikely that someone who is a best friend of mine is a super hero, and willing to tell me. Because you know what? Those super heroes are really protective of their identities. They struggle to decide if telling their best friend or romantic interest is a good idea. It could endanger the person they confide, it could endanger the super him or herself. Really, it’s a tough decision.

Beyond those in my group of friends – maybe there’s a shy super hero out there doing some cool stuff and he/she is keeping it on the down low to avoid detection.

Guess what though, folks. I know someone who is really good at keeping a secret. That someone is me.

Go ahead, email me, call me (if you have my number – or maybe one of your powers is an ability to sense people’s phone numbers – I don’t know). Lay it on me.

“Hey … got a minute?”
“Sure, what’s up? / Long time no talk! / Who is this? / How did you appear in my bedroom, and why are you wearing a skin tight outfit?”

Look at that. Look at how I am there, for you, my super hero friend. Lay it on me. So please, friends, I beg of you, I am pleading!, feel free to confide in me. It’d be super cool.

Unrelated side note: If you want to call me and you pretend to be a super hero but then just talk about emotions I’ll be really annoyed.

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