Front
Back (apologies for my handwriting!)
The text of the postcard is
Dear Ellen,
This Valentine’s Day prove to someone your love by buying them something nicer than they got you. Then say something sweet like, “I guess I do love you more” and really spice up the night by adding “did you EVER love me or has this all been a sham?” Spicy!
Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR @DumbFunnery
Donald Trump Sexually Assaults Mailbox, Republicans Rally Behind Him
Lindsay Graham (R-SC), “The president is able to think outside the box, which is why I respect him as a leader.”
Chuck Schumer, After Making a Big Deal Out of Not Getting the Coffee He Ordered … Drinks This Random Coffee He was Handed
Nancy Pelosi, seen nearby smiling her particular smile, had no comment.
Bernie Sanders (D-VT) thinking about education reform.
Donald Trump Begins Wearing Bib 24/7
Paul Ryan (R-WI), “If the president is too busy thinking about solutions to our nation’s problems, and as a result he sometimes forgets to swallow food or he drools a little, I applaud him for that.”
Bernie Sanders Revealed to be a Muppet
When informed, Cory Booker (D-NJ) shrugged.
Donald Trump at the State of the Union Declares Love of Both Goo Goo, and Gah Gah
Republicans stand and applaud at Goo Goo, Democrats and Republicans stand for Gah Gah. Rand Paul (R-KY) stays seated for both.
Front
Back (apologies for my handwriting!)
The text of the postcard is
Dear Ellen,
I feel like, with the right inflection, you can make any last name that ends in an S sound like a verb.
“Julia? Julia Roberts.”
“Tom doesn’t run, Tom Hanks!”
Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com OR
@DumbFunnery
DumbFunnery 