The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

My Zombie Roomy (3/6/12)

March 6, 2012

I’ve heard, possibly read (I really can’t remember) that dogs can be very in tune with your emotional state. They know when you’re down, and using their keen dog intellect they don’t make you take them for a walk right before bed? Who knows.

Anyway. I think the Zombie has something like this going on.

I am what I would call “actively single” right now. That’s another way of saying I haven’t been on a date in a while. The usual signs are there. I’m eating healthier. I’m exercising a lot. I’m reading more. It’s terrible. I do these things to primp myself until I trick some pretty lady into dating me, then BOOM, back to eating whatever I want and video games.

The Zombie, sweet undead fella that he is, has realized that in my actively single state I am wishing I had a girlfriend so I could be lazy. Also, you know, romance.

The last few hands I’ve caught him munching on have been men’s hands. With wedding rings on them. Isn’t the Zombino the sweetest?

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My Zombie Roomy

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What Have I Done – Rodeo Style!

March 2, 2012

This past weekend I went to the Houston Rodeo with some friends. It’s a very big deal here. Goes on seemingly forever. Here are some photos from the big event! I’ll have more pictures from this later. For tonight, just some pictures I thought were neat looking. Plus one of my boots. Yup. The boots.

Rocking the boots!

The Houston Rodeo was another 2012 Bucket List item completed!

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Pictures

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Moving Along, with Rainbow Speak

March 1, 2012

Tonight and last night I helped my friend Rainbow Speak move. It was tiresome. Here are some highlights.

  • I was carrying an arm full of big stuff to hang on walls, and a clock on top of them that is sliding around. I start walking down the stairs and stuff slides even more. Then a mosquito lands on me. That’s when I spazz out, have the clock sliding around and I’m trying to scare the mosquito away with noises and blowing my breath out. Classy.
  • I carry a standing Ikea lamp out. Rainbow Speak says, “oh yeah! I carried the other one out and pretended it was a lightsaber!” And you know what? It is a lot of fun to carry that lamp and pretend it’s a giant lightsaber. I want to get one and put a green light bulb in it. Or red if I feel evil.
    Be honest, did you look at the picture and make the “beejwooooooo” noise after that? (I don’t know how to spell the noise of a lightsaber coming on.)
  • I grab a suitcase full of stuff and some item in a cloth covering. The item has a rather distinct handle.
    Me, curiously: Uh, what is this?
    Him, matter-of-factly: It’s a sword.
    (So that he seems slightly less crazy, it was for his aikido class. It’s made of wood.)
  • Rainbow Speak has a love of Monopoly. One night maybe about half a year ago I was hanging out with he and his then girlfriend. We made mixed drinks and played Monopoly City. Rainbow Speak was happy as could be. I was drink and saying, “let’s go out! I wanna go tell myself I’ll talk to chicks, then stand around and not talk to chicks and be upset with myself!” Rainbow Speak said sure, let’s just finish this game. … Motivated by that, after bringing stuff into his new apartment I said,
    “Oh no, your Monopoly game fell out of your car. I saw it smashed to bits on the street.”
    “What? … Really?”
    He was genuinely concerned. I’m laughing maniacally while typing this.
  • Oh yeah, and I put a really ugly sweater of his (from the ugly sweater night) in his freezer. Just for kicks.

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Weekly Wacko

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