My Creativity is Taking a Nap, So Here’s a Cute Picture
Posts tagged ‘cat’
Weekly Wacko (66)
Cat-Rap
Something that happens a lot more often than I’d like is having a joke fall flat. This could be because people didn’t hear me (I can sometimes mumble), the joke was not right for the audience (know your audience) or, let’s be honest, because the joke stunk (no comment).
My sophomore year of high school I hung out with my neighbor Ryan a lot. Ryan had a CD of “The Hot Boys.” For a while he was big on playing this CD when we’d drive to Media Play and Krispy Kreme (just your typical Friday night). One of the songs had the following lyrics, “ah-whatcha need boy? [I need a hot girl] ah-whatcha want boy? [I want a hot girl].” The song is called, aptly enough, “I Need a Hot Girl.” It’s on YouTube, you can check out the video for its great lighting … right, great lighting.
One day, my mom and I were the only people at the house. The cat and dog were also around.
The cat meowed.
“Whatcha need, girl?”
Meow.
“Whatcha want, girl?”
In almost perfect synch with the song, my mom had basically duplicated one of The Hot Boys hits, except instead of meowing you’d say “I want a hot girl”/”I need a hot girl.”
Realizing this, I sang loudly, “she wants a hot girrrllll.”
My mom didn’t laugh, but I think my cat and I were at least on the same page, so we laughed about it lots.
***
Go to about 55 seconds in for the brilliant chorus.
Weekly Wacko (45)
Coming Clean
I’m going to tell you something not many people know.
What’s the big secret?
My cat’s name.
Her name … is (was) Nuts.
Nuts, the cat.
She got this name because she was crazy, aka bonkers, aka loony, aka nuts.
I didn’t usually tell people her name, instead referring to her as “meowsers” or “the cat” because, here’s a surprise, most boys don’t think ‘synonym for crazy’ when they hear the word ‘nuts.’ I was going to say I started doing this when I was in elementary school – but I realized I did this even until college, when she died. That’s because boys are perpetually stupid. Girls too, but we’re better at it.
Our dog’s name is Chaser (she got the name from a Big Dog t-shirt – “The Unleashables”). Chaser is not embarrassing to admit to, but for the sake of uniformity I have pretty much always referred to the dog and cat, not by their names, but as “the dog” and “the cat.”
Sometimes “the dog” is also called, “the pooch,” “the pup” and “the mutt.”
There you have it, the cat’s out of the bag … (I should’ve written for Frasier).
DumbFunnery 