The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘disney’

Attn: Ellen (8/15/18)




Back (apologies for my handwriting!)



The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

What’s more terrifying? Waking up in a creepy, unsettlingly sterile room like on this postcard, or a seedy motel room? 3rd option, waking up naked in the Disney castle.

Sincerely, OR

Why am I doing this?


Disney Princes and Their Kinks

  • Guy from Cinderella – feet
  • Guy from Sleeping Beauty – let’s not get into that
  • Guy from Little Mermaid – girls who, when they laugh, sound kinda like a dolphin
  • Guy from Rapunzel – you know that thing where you get a haircut but you never get rid of the hair instead you build like a little home? This guy knows allll about that
  • Guy from Beauty and the Beast – rumor has it when he was first turned into a “beast” he thought, “sweet, I’ll weed out the weird girls who aren’t into animals” … but then I guess he realized, as a beast, how much more difficult it was to use toilet paper so he was a little fed up with the idea of being a beast at that point

Hey girl, lemme see those feet … Awwwyissss

Disney Review Puns

Robin Williams is great as the genie, it’s like I was in an AladDIN of laughter!


This film was Little MerMAID to have you learn to love again!

I’d be a lyin’ king if I didn’t tell you how I just love The Lion King!

It’ll Poca-Haunt-U if you don’t see Pocahontas!

You know, Lilo & Stitch wasn’t that good.

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