The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘high school’

Keys to Successfully Watching the Super Bowl

If you are an NFL fan then by now you have heard all about Peyton Manning, Richard Sherman and Bob Barker.

Can Peyton legitimize his legacy by winning a second Super Bowl, moving his record in the big game from 1-1 to 2-1?

Can Richard Sherman back up his big words with big play? Can people forgive a braggart, or will on the fence fans cheer for Peyton because they don’t like a big mouth?

Will Bob Barker’s veiled, cryptic words on the last episode of “The Price is Right” that he appeared on be correct?

These questions will only be answered at the Super Bowl!

Grab some popcorn, chat with your friends (but during this game you chat DURING the game, not during commercials), and enjoy what happens!

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Pssst. In high school I had to read The Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad. The next step was obvious – I had to write a paper on the book. I turned to the internet for help and one of the sites I found was incredible.

I looked up the book trying to find out the themes, motifs, the usual “beyond the words” kind of meanings that somehow English professors/teachers find so obvious but that always escape me. The site I found had exactly what I was looking for … except the author of the site was playing a practical joke.

The site described enough of the book accurately to convince lazy students that it was legitimate, but the site also contained a bunch of made up nonsense. It was one of the funniest things I’d ever read.

I could just see a student handing in a paper confidently, only to get back an F with a note, “there were no unicorns in The Heart of Darkness. The next time you try and fake a paper, at least look up the synopsis from a credible source.”

I didn’t want to actually have people thinking that Bob Barker had some cryptic message years ago that was somehow tied to this game (would you have really believed that?) … But maybe some future post I’ll do that.

Attn: Ellen (1/8/14)

Front

Ellen151a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen151b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

I bet if I was a horse and going to my first day of horse high school and I saw other horses and I said “hey” some bully horse would say “horses eat hay!” I’d probably try to have a quick response like, “that joke is stale-ion … like stallion …”

This hypothetical horse high school would be tough for me.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

The Great Gatsby, and the Teenage Girl

Yesterday I posted quotes from a book I really like – The Great Gatsby. I re-read this recently for book club, and I enjoyed it. I bought a used copy from a Half Price Bookstore (I have a nice copy at my parent’s house, along with all the other books I read in high school).

Normally I look for a nice, clean looking copy – but I settled for this one despite seeing that some lines were underlined. I’m glad I did. The previous owner turned out to be Adrienne, as seen from this stamp. Adrienne is a pretty keen and funny girl, and I would’ve liked to have been her friend in high school.

Hopefully you’ll find her little notes as amusing as I did.

 

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