The Oceanfront – One of the apartments has a view of the ocean … If you use a telescope during high tide.
The Pelazzo – Has prints of Italian paintings hanging in the lobby.
The Palms – Has a palm tree and plans to get another soon. (After they raise your rent to afford it.)
The Marquis – Expensive. Really expensive. But very nice.
The Marquis Grande – Really cheap, and it shows.
Coming Clean
I’m going to tell you something not many people know.
What’s the big secret?
My cat’s name.
Her name … is (was) Nuts.
Nuts, the cat.
She got this name because she was crazy, aka bonkers, aka loony, aka nuts.
I didn’t usually tell people her name, instead referring to her as “meowsers” or “the cat” because, here’s a surprise, most boys don’t think ‘synonym for crazy’ when they hear the word ‘nuts.’ I was going to say I started doing this when I was in elementary school – but I realized I did this even until college, when she died. That’s because boys are perpetually stupid. Girls too, but we’re better at it.
Our dog’s name is Chaser (she got the name from a Big Dog t-shirt – “The Unleashables”). Chaser is not embarrassing to admit to, but for the sake of uniformity I have pretty much always referred to the dog and cat, not by their names, but as “the dog” and “the cat.”
Sometimes “the dog” is also called, “the pooch,” “the pup” and “the mutt.”
There you have it, the cat’s out of the bag … (I should’ve written for Frasier).
DumbFunnery 