The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘dumb’

Illuminating? Nah.

Screen Shot 2016-04-05 at 8.06.18 PM

I took the transcript of Trump’s interview with the Washington Post editorial board and I narrowed it down to just Trump’s answers. I thought, ‘this will be really interesting!’ Is it? Mildly.

In the course of the interview, Trump said 9,213 words. Above are the top 50 most commonly used. The word ‘don’t’ was actually the most used, but the tool I used is apparently a piece of junk and can’t handle contractions.

A few thoughts!

  • A challenge to you, dear reader, take these 50 words and make them into a story. (Below, see my attempt!)
  • No joke, one of the 50 most commonly used words in that interview … was Trump!
  • Think was most used (87 times), then people (71), don’t (75 times)
  • Actually was only used 19 times, which surprised me (I could’ve sworn he said that every sentence)

 

Here is the Trump interview, using only those 50 words.

Okay Baltimore person, start? Oh.
Everybody send stories, read, writes thought … talking jobs done different, create change.
Problem: People probably saying China bad.
Trump think screaming American spending million troops work really tremendous.
Deal.
Money things win world, country. Building example happened.
Heard guy hands going give better something? Lot!

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Du Jour of the Week

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Attn: Ellen (4/6/16)

Front

Ellen256a

Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

Ellen256b

The text of the postcard is

Dear Ellen,

Talking politics
Trump leads me to duplicate
The drama symbol

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Why am I doing this?

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Attn: Ellen

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My (Prairie) Dogs Are Barking

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A few weeks ago my wife and I were driving home and we saw one, two, three … I have no idea how many, but a bunch of prairie dogs! How cool!

A few days later we headed out on our bikes. I was convinced I’d be able get a good close-up picture of these little buggers.

Apparently, though, cars don’t cause those guys to sound the alarm … but bikers, joggers and walkers do. Try as I might, I couldn’t get nearly as close as I was when zipping by them in my car.

I don’t know which intrepid prairie dogs were the first ones to take up home next to a busy road, but they have learned to think nothing of cars. When you think about it, that’s a pretty crazy and intelligent step for them. Was it a quick step? Or was the first family of prairie dogs that lived near a road a family that was constantly on edge? Constantly out chirping at each other,

“Alan! Steve! Get back in here! There’s trouble afoot! … Oh it’s gone. Ok nevermind. WAIT! NO! Trouble afoot again! Wait, gone ag – IT’S B … Ok, gone. NO!”

You get the idea.

DumbFunnery.com will kindly allow you to buy me a fancy camera so I can get a great picture from a distance. Really, I don’t mind at all. Buy me one. It’s totally cool.

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Du Jour of the Week

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