The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘fun’

Attn: Ellen (6/8/11)

Front



Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

The text of the postcard is:

Dear Ellen,

I love wildflowers. They’re like nature’s version of finding a dollar in your pocket.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Category:

Attn: Ellen

Tagged with:

Birthday Card/Sympathy Card/Congratulations on the New Baby Card

Do you have a friend with a birthday coming up? Or need to express sympathy? Or have a friend with a new kiddo? Not sure what to get your friend? How about start with a nice card – and I’ve designed just the card for you.

Front:

Inside:

For birthdays – this card has led to a hug in 7 out of every 8 cases.

For sympathy – cathartic tears were cried 127% of the time (nearby people also began crying upon seeing this card, resulting in a percent of criers exceeding 100%).

For the new baby – it is not yet known what the effects of this card are, but go for it and let us know how it works.

Note: please DO NOT give this card as a congratulations on graduating gift. In 90% of test cases the recent graduate, upon receiving this card, became a carny. The weight-guessing kind of carny.

Category:

Du Jour of the Week, Pictures

Tagged with:

Modern Day Mechanics

With the way computers are coming up so big, and people of all backgrounds are buying them – tech geeks are the modern day mechanics.

“Uhhh … hey, I have a question.”
“Yes, sir, how can I help you today?”
“Yeah … So … Uh … My computer … Um … Is always making noise. And I want it to stop.”
“Making noise, sir?”
“Yeah. Like … whirrrrr.”
“Sir?”
“Umm … ya know … it’ll just be sitting there and then … whirrrr.”
“Is this a laptop or a desktop?”
“It’s … uh … what’re … oh! It’s a lap – top.”
“You need a cooling fan. Aisle fourteen B.”
“A cooling fan?”
“Yes, sir.”
“What? What do you take me for? Are you guys just making up new parts all the time? This is –“
“We have a special right now, only fifteen dollars.”
“Oh … ok. Which aisle? Fourteen?”

Category:

Short Short Stories

Tagged with: