The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘ham’

Well Done, Ham Industry

I’ve never been a fan of ham. Some foods that I disliked as a child I enjoy now, like broccoli, lettuce, salad, tomatoes, etc. But ham has always been on my no thanks list.

And YET, even knowing that I don’t enjoy it, I still see the names of ham products at the grocery store and can’t help but think, mmm, that sounds good.

  • Honey Baked Ham
    • Are you kidding me? That sounds amazing!
  • Black Forest Ham
    • Is Robin Hood himself delivering this ham to me?, because that’s what the title implies in my mind.
  • Mystical Ham Boat
    • I just made this up, but you’d buy it, wouldn’t you?
  • In French the word ham is ‘jambon’
    • Jambon! Jam on! It’s like Michael Jackson himself couldn’t help but randomly say ‘ham!’ while singing (perhaps he messed up the pronunciation).

I tip my hat to you, ham industry. I can’t wait to see what you come up with next.

And let’s not forget about this walking advertisement.

My Zombie Roomy (10/31/13)

You’d think I was a bad roommate, or at least oblivious, based on how little I’ve written about the Zomb. I don’t really have an excuse for the lack of updates … But I promise they will be coming soon (like Monday of next week). Yes, that’s right, Monday will have part 2 of the Great Zombino and I’s Smelly Brush With Death (at least my brush with death, seeing as how he is already fully coated in it).

Today I want to brag about myself though, and what an awesome roommate I am.

There is a drive in movie theatre not too terribly far from where I live and they are showing three horror movies tonight – a Halloween special. As a special gift to my buddy, my pal, we are going there tonight. He doesn’t know it yet but it’s true.

This is a gift for the Zombie for several reasons:

1) He doesn’t have to hide his stink or what he looks like – people will just think it’s a killer costume (Halloween is his favorite holiday, after all … see here, here, or here, oh or here …)

2) He gets to be admired for his amazing costume

3) (Most importantly) We get to wreck some dates! Awesome! The Zombino loves a good joke, so I am sure he will manage to sneak up on some unsuspecting promiscuous minded teenagers out to see some horror movies (Oh I’m so scared … Here I’ll hold you …) and he is going to foul up their plans with his impressive stench.

Happy Halloween everyone!

You would be absolutely right, on both accounts. But that’s for next week.

%d bloggers like this: