The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘Du Jour of the Week’

If I Started a Think Tank, Part I

Although I am sure you are aware, I will give the definition of a think tank (source):

An institute, corporation, or group organized for interdisciplinary research (as in technological and social problems) – called also think factory

I don’t think I’ve ever heard the phrase ‘think factory’ but that conjures up all kinds of fun, Roald Dahl-esque imagery.

Anyhow. I went to a wine tasting/grading party on Saturday night and I got drunk. In my drunken state I began to daydream about my own think tank.
‘What’s that? DumbFunnery as the originator of a think tank?’
Why, yes, friend. It not only could happen – it WILL happen. But only if you use the phrase ‘think tank’ in a non-traditional, less-work involving way.

First things first, though. What’s the name of my think tank? Here are some ideas. Feel free to vote.

Please feel free to write in other names if you have something good. If your idea is selected, the think tank will tackle any problem of your choosing. Or if that just sounds like I’m relying on you to be creative in two seperate instances, I’ll figure something else out. You jerk.

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Communication Problems

Effective communication is a difficult thing. Often it stands in the way of great progress being made. I know it’s certainly a problem where I work, and that probably goes for every work place.

That’s why this is so embarrassing for me to admit.

Communication with myself often falls far short. Here are a few examples.

1. “Ok Brad, clean the dishes, then you can relax.”

20 minutes later – “Wait, was I supposed to clean the dishes, or eat this bag of mini-doughnuts? Because I see a lot of dirty dishes, and NO doughnuts …”

2. “Ok … I’ll set my alarm for … 6 am … I’ll wake up and do sit-ups before getting ready for work and in no time I’ll have super freak abs.”

7:30 am, “SHOOT … Wait, wow … I snoozed my alarm so many times it gave up … Impressive!”

3. “All right guys, this is my last game then I need to head to bed. Battlefield 3 can’t run my life.”

20 minutes later: “No I can’t go to sleep after THAT …”

50 minutes later: “I am so glad we have that coffee place right by work. One more game?”

… Not a very good post, right? Eh. You’re probably too comatose from Turkey to care. And if you do care, go eat some pie, come back and read this in a better mood.

Happy leftovers day everyone! (Well, everyone in the States that is. Sorry Canadian friend, and semi-Canadian friend.)

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Ode to Memes

Just as a note, this poem could’ve gone on forever. I did this just for kicks and worked in some of these that amuse me far too much. You sit there, and you think of yourself as a somewhat intelligent person, and then four hours later you realize you’re not (as you’re clicking on yet another dumb video/picture/whatever).

Lastly, if you don’t know what a meme is, you will soon.

Ode to Memes

I can has definition?

A meme is an image, video, etc. that is on a mission

Passed from one person to another til it’s reached your vision

And like Rebecca Black’s Friday

I think it’s here to stay

If you think you understand the meme

It’s not as simple as it may seem

Chemistry Cat can’t help you

Neither can Sad Keanu

You can question the philoosraptor

But he’ll just Rick-Roll you once more

“All your time are belong to us!” the memes say

Y U No realize you’ve just wasted another day?

So just fuuuuuu it

Because like the Loituma Girl it’ll stick despite no wit

(Oh, was that so bad that you want to pick up a bat?

Then you probably don’t want to meet the Nyan Cat)

Yes, internet, it’s to your stupidity that I tip my hat,

Now play me off Keyboard Cat!

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