The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘dumb’

Lost Shakespeare Transcript Found!

Amazing! I don’t know how these things happen, but I found a transcript of a conversation THE William Shakespeare had with a certain love interest. Here we go, from me to you!

* * *

William Shakespeare (WS): Hey honey. I’m home.
Love Interest (LI): Darling!! How was your day?
WS: Not bad, not bad. I drank, and I wrote a play.
LI: Oh! I’m so proud of you!!
WS: Thanks. It’s called Hamlet.
LI: Aw! Did you write it while you were thinking of me? Like how your ex inspired you to write Romeo and Juliet with your amazing love?
WS: Uh … Yeah I actually did think about you while I wrote this.
LI: We can talk later! Let me read it!! Wow! I’m your muse!!

(Later that day)

LI: What the hell, Bill.
WS: You read it?
LI: Uh. Yeah.
WS: Ha … so … did you like it?
LI: Talk about your all time passive aggressive.
WS: What? With my ex I thought about love so strong you couldn’t live without it. With you I thought of … murder. It’s just a different dynamic?
LI: I seriously hate you.
WS: Awww come on!
LI: How can you think our relationship is good if, while dating me, you write a play where EVERYONE DIES.
WS: Life is fleeting. Just like relationships.
LI: …
WS: Oh. Whoops. Haha! Um, no. Let me say that again. Life is fleeting. Unlike our relationship?
LI: …
WS: …Who wants ice cream?

Attn: Ellen (10/12/11)

Front


Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

The text of the postcard is:

Dear Ellen,

I just returned from my first trip to Europe!

Europe!!

Land of wonder, and beer, and chocolate, and such history!

And now source for the next batch of postcards since I bought a crap ton while there. Sorry, Europe.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

P.S. How. Are. You?!

Leaping with DumbFunnery?

Well, I guess I already knew this – but I like photos where I’m leaping. I don’t know why, but I do. Check out some new ones now that I’m back from my fancy trip. (I promise to get less lazy on my posts after this one …)

J’s one of this is WAY better – but it was my idea so he just perfected it.

Spazzing out/hovering. Like ya do …

The I Amsterdam sign is back behind me. Along with confused park-goers.