Front
Back (apologies for my handwriting!)
The text of the postcard is
Dear Ellen,
To make the home-cooked Thanksgiving food even tastier, for the past 10 years (since I left home for college), I have been eating really junky, gross foods.
Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com
P.S. I know this is one of my lamer postcards, but who cares!?, tomorrow is feed your face day!
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
I decided on an identity for myself for classes. Is it too late? Let’s hope not, because it’s a gem of an identity.
I will be! … Wikipedia Joke Guy!
Here’s how it will work …
Professor: Well on this slide there are only nine things in the Common Body of Knowledge but … I thought there were ten …
(A minute later)
Me: Uh, professor … I just looked it up on Wikipedia. There are ten, I think you’re missing the “Operations Security” part and also, according to Wikipedia, Tommy Harris is a big stink face.
Aren’t I zany!? You see, anyone can update Wikipedia, so … I’m pretending that some random little kid … Um, you know … Went on Wikipedia and wrote … that … So … Sorry, keep going, Professor.
I have a feeling that would be the follow-up comment to my joke. There would probably be a few people in class who would get my joke, and the joke would maybe even get a smirk or two, but everyone would let me sit there in my joke explanation pain.
But would that stop me? Hardly.
Boss: Well I’m not sure when the Agile methodology actually started …
Me: According to Wikipedia it started in 2001, and also dinosaurs are a ploy by the government to distract us from the fact that Lasik is an experiment in mind control.
Cue the crickets, and the awkward joke explanation talk.
I don’t know what came over me but suddenly I was so curious if the Zombie is ticklish. I’m not going to stretch this out and tell you that I found out. It would’ve felt weird to find that out.
It’s like my cheating test. If you’re dating someone, and you have a friend who is the same sex as your boyfriend/girlfriend … here’s how you know if what you are doing is something you should NOT be doing. I’ll use myself as an example.
(Note: This works better for the stereotypical fella.)
Let’s say I have a girlfriend. And one day I am hanging out with a female friend. I picture myself doing whatever this female friend and I are doing with a guy friend … If I feel like I would feel awkward doing that with a guy friend, I shouldn’t be doing it with a female friend. So easy! For example, if we’re both crying and talking about our childhood memories, this is “emotional cheating” (a term I learned from an ex). Of course there are exceptions to this rule, but it’s a good general rule of thumb.
Now to bring it back – I could never tickle a girl if I was dating someone because that would feel like cheating. I would not try to tickle a dude friend. The Zombie is, basically, a dude friend. Therefore, no tickling can happen.
I can’t ask the Zombie either. Just TRY to ask that guy a question and get a straight answer. The mystery of the ticklish state of the Zombino remains … I’ll think of something though. Don’t you worry.
DumbFunnery 