Recently I completed writing my “self-assessment” for work. For this I have to give examples of how I met particular goals that I wrote for myself for the year. Some of the goals are really vague and pushed down from … yes it’s cliche, corporate.
Here are some items I wrote that I ended up deciding not to use, because they may not positively impact my performance rating.
1
Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Integrity.
2
I am a self-motivated worker, who takes the time to help others to also become more self-motivated. How do I do this? I walk around in their shoes for a mile. Literally. For this reason, my best working relationships are with guys who wear shoes that are my size or bigger.
3
Work is often about trying innovative ideas and seeing what sticks. In the past year, I have tried a number of great ideas that didn’t pan out, but I think they planted seeds that will grow into trees. One example of an idea was to have everyone provide instant feedback in the form of saying, “upvote,” “downvote,” or “mute.” Some great things came out of that, like the very well-written memos talking about a culture of respect.
4
Am I doing well at my job? Yes. Do I ask myself questions just to answer them? Absolutely. Is this what led to my being on a “self-directed team of one”? That can’t be determined. Will I ever get an audience to present what I have been working on? Seriously, will I?
DumbFunnery 