The intellectual equivalent of a ham sandwich.

Posts tagged ‘copenhagen’

Attn: Ellen (11/16/11)

Front



Back (apologies for my handwriting!)

The text of the postcard is:

Dear Ellen,

Copenhagen was beautiful. I honestly wouldn’t have been surprised if a unicorn walked by when we were walking around.

UNLESS the unicorn was not pretty – in which case it would not pass Copenhagen citizenry requirements.

Sincerely,
DumbFunnery.com

Ignorant Readings of Books I Bought in Europe

And longest post title of the week award goes to …

Here’s the vid. Full of a bad southern accent (my go to “dumb guy” voice). Sorry, South.

Oh yeah and I don’t have anything against UT … I just thought “why not?” for that being the t-shirt I wore. I’ll go and buy this shirt for my next southern guy video (if I’m not lazy …):

International Language of Dumb

 

 

*That’s a children’s book – and I was at Copenhagen University. So it’s funny, see?

Full Bags and Brains

What a trip! What an adventure! When I get home I’m going to pull up Skype and talk to my rents. It’ll be nice. I think I may go ahead and record the stories I tell, so that when people at work come up to me (one at a time, mind you) and say, “how was the trip!?,” I can just play the recording.

Wait, why am I preemptively angry about this? I should still be in a chocolate-filled, booze-filled, you’re-so-pretty-it-hurts-me-and-makes-me-wish-I-had-better-than-20-20-vision-filled daze!

I am excited about the gifts I bought for my family.

For my brother – a post-it note with a drawing I did of me in front of a wall
For my sister – a packet of ketchup from Germany that says “ketchup” (they have the same word for ketchup! How zany is that!)
For my mom – a list of names that would be cooler than mine (Thor, AppleSauce, Lean Geraldine, etc)
For my dad – a shoe (unknown size, presumed female shoe based on the heel and pink polka dots)

The best part of the gifts is that I got/made all of them when I was really drunk.

Home of the Free, and the Rave

I really wish I had thought of this title back when I was in Amsterdam. How perfect!

Today we are going around asking people if their windmill is running, and then we’re going to say “well you better go catch it!!” After seven tries we’ve discovered not nearly as many people own windmills as we’d first suspected.

Seeing some guy in his 50s/60s, with nice silver fox hair, and a rich guy sweater (you know, it looks very plain but the fabric is insanely nice) – you’d think he’d be BOUND to own at LEAST one windmill, right? Wrong. I know, it feels wrong to even say wrong.

Actually. Wait. I bet Germany is just full of liars. I can picture it now.

“Yah. Zee tourists aw hee-awh.”
“Oh? Mine gootness. Letz play a joke on zem, yah?”
“Oh. Yah! How goot, mine friend!”

I can’t wait to leave!!

Oooh, a chocolate shop! How adorable!

Oktoberfest Lesson

In Germany you can get really drunk. Especially when you drink. And drink. And drink. And try to say the word ‘lederhosen’ but instead just giggle til you can’t breathe. And drink.

Today I am sitting on a couch. Moving very little.

Yesterday J kept doing the funniest thing. He would start to laugh. Then that would make me laugh. Now that I think about it, it was probably only funny because I was so, so very drunk.

I’ll take this opportunity to do a little reflection:

Pro for America – I speak the language

Con for America – When I return I will have to work

I can’t believe I thought about work! I have two days of vacation left. I am now going to purge the thought of work by singing to the porcelain pal. I call this one, “ashfuhgsighasilgu” (that’s the sound of me puking).

You’ve Fest with the Rest,

Now Fest with the Best! Here we are in lovely (what country is this?) Munich!

Am I the only person who hears Munich and pictures an evil Vampire? I’m on constant Vamp-watch. I told J about this and he just sighed and shook his head. I told him I still had his back and he did this thing where he loses me in a crowd. He’s always challenging my “have your back” abilities – and I’m up for the challenge.

I don’t want to brag, but the more I’m touring around Europe, the more I feel like Wesley Snipes in Blade. Only I’m not black. And I don’t have any weapons. And I’m not that fit. And I don’t actually believe in Vampires.

I guess what I’m saying is I just seem moody. But hey, if it’s good enough for Blade it’s good enough for me!

Ok, back to looking for J.

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