Front
Back (apologies for my handwriting!)
As an FYI, the postcard is from when I went to a Giants game – it was a free giveaway!
The text of the postcard is:
Dear Ellen,
Here’s another baseball fact for you:
Nolan Ryan threw the most no-hitters, physically. But emotionally, it was Barbra Streisand.
Don’t believe me? Just ask Santa Claus.
Sincerely,
One of the best knowers of fake news,
With long goodbye messages,
GetBradStanleyPublished.com
(please?)
WOW! Mind-blowing realization today about the Zombie, and all zombies, while at work!
I’ll share with you how I came to this thought.
I started thinking the Zombie is pretty asexual. He never talks about any particular girl or guy. No interest in anyone it seems – which I don’t get! The Zombie has a lot going for himself, and I think if he’d just put himself out there … well, never mind all that.
I was thinking about this whole ‘asexual’ thing and then thought, wait let me look up asexual to see that I have it right. And I did, but also there’s ‘asexual reproduction.’ And zombies reproduce by killing … so it’s like, equating it to most other animals, when a zombie kills you they’re having sex with you!
DANG!
Suddenly there are a ton of horror/porn flicks on the market. Sean of the Dead? Porn. 28 Days Later? Porn. That’s right, people, you’re into zombie porn.
Chew on that.
I noticed Michael Ian Black’s very bizarre twitter background (@michaelianblack) and I thought … I needs me one of those.
SO on this very fine day with clearly too much free time I attacked this project.
This past weekend I went to San Antonio (where the birds are feisty). The girlfriend unit and I were hanging out and she went to take a picture of me, and at the same time someone came up behind me – so I was looking in his direction.
We also went to the zoo and I took some pictures of a jaguar. Why a jaguar? Because they’re really awesome. In fact, many people have said I am quite like a jaguar (pssst that statement is a lie, see here). Anyhow – rad jaguar picture:
Then I thought, what about a background? Here we have a lovely picture I took when my mom and I drove to the Grand Canyon:
So what do we get? Check it out @haikustanley … or just look below:
Thank goodness for Fridays – or crap like this wouldn’t exist.
DumbFunnery 
